Good morning ladies and gentleman. It’s great to see our country expand, and it’s great to see our country expand. Indeed, it’s not very easy for one to think straight in the middle of the night. So, I would like to take this opportunity to welcome our new scholars, Nicole and Justin. They are now being educated at the Academy of Lame Arts, though I must say they are two distinctly lame individuals who absolutely need no training. *Clap Clap*. I wish to add that Nicole has been very enthusiastic in spreading Lamerism. She has posted on our Official Chronicles and has even promoted Lame Isles through her MSN Nickname. Yesterday, as I was reading the news about the September 11 Commission’s Report on their findings, I noted that a key issue in the failure to cope well with the terrorist attack was the lack of communication between their officials. So I thanked God that there are only seven citizens in Lame Isles. However, we must still be ever-vigilant, never ever letting terrorism reach our home ground. In addition, we must constantly spread the goodness of Lamerism to the world, by doing our part in fighting global terrorism. Thank you.

Note: This speech was prepared at 0044 in the morning so please pardon me if it was lousily written.